I have huge news, the hugest news that almost anybody can I have. I am pregnant! Though currently, pregnancy is kicking my butt. I have never been this tired in my life.
And, in college I had bronchitis, the flu, and pneumonia all at the same
time. I am not much of a napper in real life, but, in pregnant life, I
just can't get through the day without falling asleep for anywhere from
20 minutes to 3 hours. And, at almost no point since figuring out I was
pregnant, have I felt anywhere near the amount of energy that I consider
"normal." It is a huge adjustment, and one that I have had to succumb
to because my body isn't giving me any other choice. I am just walking
around in a stupor, and feel lucky when I have enough energy to make
something healthy to eat and not get nauseated in the process of trying
to figure out what to cook.
What I haven't been able to even come close to doing is finishing
projects at my normal speed. A "real life day" looks like this: make a bunch
ceramic things, keep up with emails and social media, carve for hours
on end and maybe print, take the dog for an hour long walk, make a healthy vegetarian breakfast, lunch and dinner,
visit with a friend for a few hours, paint on clay things for awhile,
read before bed, I often keep myself busy for 10 hours a day with art related tasks. A "pregnant day" looks like this: try to make
breakfast, husband comes down and finishes breakfast because I am too
tired and have to sit on the couch. Eat breakfast, then get tired again
have to sit on the couch. Read for awhile and not realize if I am awake
or dozing. Have the desire to get up off my butt and do something to
grab the dog leash to go for a walk. Get completely out of breath, walk
for 1/2 mile because I just can't go any further, come home and sit on
the couch. Eat something simple for lunch because I only have the energy
to put peanut butter on a banana. Husband may make something healthy
like juice (thank goodness.) Sit on the couch and read but really fall
asleep this time for 2 hours. Wake up and it's 4. Look at the computer,
see if anything is pressing, if somebody wants to buy something, muster
up the energy to look for the thing the person wants to buy. Try to pack
the thing (this may take a few days in pregnancy world.) Maybe carve for 20 minutes, but, get really sore in the process so go back to the couch and read. Watch a documentary. Go to bed.
I am super lucky to have a supportive husband in this process. He
says all the time when I am being hard on myself for not getting enough
done in a day, that I am working really hard making fingers and toes and
all the other baby parts. Anything else that I get done just sweetens
the deal. Thank goodness for supportive husbands.
How
do pregnant women in high pressured office environments deal? We have
very little flex time in this country when it comes to a traditional
work week, very little sick time, and then when the baby comes, there is
very little maternity leave. It's crazy! I am so lucky to be self
employed and to have a model in place (art
festivals) that allow me to sell my work directly to clients and make a
profit. But, I do have to travel. I have no idea how it is going to feel
being on the streets of Philly with a 4 month old trying to sell my
work, but, I have to do it, and am glad to do it because it gives me so
much control in the other 85% of my life. And, I have an amazing partner
who is going to be right there with me 100%.
So, onto this journey, we shall see where it goes...
